Becoming Your Own Leader

Thoughts on mastering Self Leadership

Imagine having the same deep, supportive relationship with yourself as you would with a best friend—knowing your strengths, accepting your limitations, and always striving for your best.

This is the core of self-leadership: a practice that begins with cultivating a positive and honest relationship with yourself. When you truly know yourself, you build trust in your ability to navigate life, especially during uncertain times.

"Self leadership is a comprehensive self-influence perspective that concerns leading oneself toward performance of naturally motivating tasks as well as managing oneself to do work that must be done but is not naturally motivating" 
                                                                                                                               (Manz, 1986)

The term self-leadership first emerged from organizational management literature, introduced by Charles C. Manz in 1983. Self-leadership is like being both your own coach and cheerleader—guiding yourself through what excites you and what challenges you.

Mastering self-leadership involves developing confidence around four key skills:

1. Self-Awareness
   Self-leadership begins with knowing who you are—your strengths, weaknesses, values, and emotional triggers. Self-awareness is the ability to recognize how you respond to challenges and understand the patterns that influence your behavior. This awareness allows you to make better decisions and adjust your actions in alignment with your goals and values.

2. Self-Regulation
   Self-regulation is the ability to experience your emotions without letting them take control. Instead of being overwhelmed by feelings like frustration or anxiety, self-regulation helps you channel that energy in constructive ways. For instance, feeling nervous before a challenge can be turned into fuel for better performance. By managing your emotions, you maintain clarity and focus, especially in stressful situations, ensuring you stay aligned with your long-term goals.

3. Ownership of Your Circumstances
   Taking ownership means accepting responsibility for where you are in life, regardless of external factors. While you may not control everything, you do have power over your responses and the direction you choose. Ownership is empowering; it gives you the agency to shape your journey instead of blaming others or external circumstances for your challenges.

4. Discipline to See Your Goals Through
   Discipline is the ability to consistently show up for yourself, even when motivation fades. It’s about building habits and systems that keep you focused on your goals, ensuring steady progress. Discipline combats fragility by adapting when setbacks arise and continuing to move toward your vision despite obstacles.

Self-leadership is a continuous process of iteration and refinement. However, there are practical strategies that can accelerate your path to self-mastery:

1. Regular Self-Reflection
   Make time for personal check-ins to assess how you’re feeling and progressing. Use mindfulness or physical activity to manage stress and process emotions. Reflect on your goals and remind yourself why they matter. Adjust your expectations based on the realities around you, and explore the opportunities for growth that arise.

   

   It is time - image inspired by The Lion King

2. Purpose-Aligned Goals
   With a clear sense of your purpose and awareness of current opportunities, create milestones to track your progress. These smaller steps will help you maintain momentum. Regularly review your goals and milestones, ensuring they continue to align with your evolving vision.

3. Gratitude and Resilience
   During setbacks, practice gratitude by focusing on small victories and the lessons learned. Shift your perspective to see opportunities in adversity. Resilience isn’t just about pushing through; it’s about adapting and learning from each challenge so that you emerge stronger. Persistence, paired with flexibility, creates a balanced approach to overcoming obstacles.

   

   Artistic depiction of self leadership.

The journey into leadership begins long before you’re formally recognized as a leader. It starts with taking ownership of your life and the choices you make. Self-leadership is not just a stepping stone to leadership—it’s a way of life for anyone aspiring to lead others effectively. The more impact your leadership has, the more essential it becomes to stay centered and grounded in your values.

In a world of constant change, self-leadership ensures you lead with responsibility and integrity. As you refine your ability to lead yourself, you naturally develop the capacity to lead others with authenticity and purpose.